{Friday, March 19, 2010} 9:19 PM
A post before this post is save to record down my previous post op days. I will post it up when i complete it. After all it is a tiring one.

Went for my dental appointment to see Doctor Yong today. Dad was unable to drive me to AH because he needs to go JB. So ended up taking bus and mrt all the way to AH with the accompany of my Mum. And yes, with my swollen up face too. It is a damn tiring and giddy day. Never felt so tired before.

Dr Yong return me back my moulds of my teeth. AH Dental is moving to KTP hospital @ Yishun and my next appt would be all the way at Yishun. Great, at least now i could take bus 39 there.
And he told me to go lose weight (for the double chin) and rebond my hair (becos it is messy) to look more pretty. This should be the first time and last time i hear him saying that. And that should be his image of me for the past 3 years. OMG, now then i now.

My face now really looks very round, short and chubby in a way. I am actually very very worried and fear that it will forever remain like this. No one can understand the anxiety and fear inside me when i woke up every morning and i don't feel like i am me. The shape of my face changes alot alot. From a narrow long face to a short, round and chubby face. And my double chin starts to appear and i look like someone with no neck. I really didnt expect the changes to be so huge. And i understand that it is only 1 week, so swelling will still be there.

The only thing that encourages me to go on is food. The fact that i could eat a burger in a normal way is something that i wish for a long time.

Now i really feel difficult to move on especially when you can't talk, you feel hungry all day. And lastly is i feel that no one is there for me except for my family members, the gardenians and my sister friends from CHC. Friends, i really don't whether if they really care. I am disappointed with the fact that most of them are not there for me when i need them most. Not even an sms or some encouragements.

Where are u all when i need you all the most?

It has also been a long long time since i watch TV. And i am spending more time with TV then com during these days because i feel tired and giddy when i sit in front of the com.

I probably gonna spend more time with TV the my com for now.

Please give me courage to move on. I had to even if i don't want.